I have had the bestest weekend ever! My parent's 20th anniversary is next week and my dad planned a getaway for the two of them at a Bed and Breakfast in Independence, MO. What mom didn't know, was that we had conspired with Dad and were going to be there also. Jeremy couldn't get off work for Friday and Saturday, but Tanner and I, and Hondo and Jess headed to KC to be with them. We arrived at the B&B before Mom and Dad did. Our Rooms were lovely. Tanner and I had "The Magnolia Room", and Hondo and Jess had "The Judges Library". My parents had the fancy digs. Mom was so surprised to find us waiting outside their room--I think she would have whooped with joy...had her voice not been compromised. We had a fun family dinner together at the coolest restaurant ever! Then, we headed back to the Inn for a good nights sleep. May I just say that the bed in my room was the most comfortable one I have ever had the pleasure of sleeping on. (Please forgive that I just ended that sentence in a preposition). We got up early on Saturday and had a DELICIOUS breakfast of waffles and some kind of yummy egg wrap thingy (I am sure that's not the technical term). After a fun little outing at the Lakeside Nature Center we all headed for home. Tanner and I got home around three--although if I hadn't sat in traffic for thirty minutes it would have been a lot sooner (I'm not kidding, mom, as SOON as I had hung up the phone from talking to you traffic came to a screeching halt--there was an accident on I-44 and it had backed up traffic for two miles on Hwy 13. Then we watched some cartoons together and just kind of lazed around until it was time to go to bed. This afternoon we have just enjoyed our family time as usual. Tanner and Jeremy are outside playing soccer and Tanner is teaching Daddy some kind of "victory dance" he has picked up from somewhere. It's cute. He stomps his feet, swivels his hips, does some kind of "raise the roof" move with his hands and then shakes his head from side to side. I was impressed. I am thinking I need some quiet time and may go hop onto my bed and watch one of those wonderful English chick flicks my father dreads so much. I love you all and will blog again soon.

Haircut Horror

My poor Tanner did the unthinkable today. Well, maybe it's not all that unthinkable since you hear about it all the time...he took a pair of scissors to his beautiful blond hair! And the only way we could fix it was for Jeremy to buzz it off!!! Later I will cry, right now I am still in shock. I know that in the grander scheme of things it's not really all that big a deal. But it REALLY looks bad. I love my husband with all my heart, but the man is no barber...I mean, he TRIED to fix it so he gets bonus points for that--but secretly I think the buzz cut looks worse than the choppy cutting job Tanner did on the front. C'est la vie, I suppose. We were planning on getting it cut later this week. I guess Tanner just decided that he didn't want to wait anymore. It was just yesterday that he was so proud that he could spike it up really tall. He even made me take a picture of him to share with Nana and Papa. Rest assured there will be NO pictures of the "new do" It is something I won't want to remember! On the bright side, at least it's not a mullet (a.k.a. the "achy breaky big mistakey")!

Goodbye Ol' Faithful

Today, Jeremy bought HIS very first new car EVER (I have had TWO since we've been married)! He is so excited about it...and durn it all, I am too. The Mazda...aka Ol' Faithful...aka Smoky...aka The Death Trap, was just about to give up on him...it just turned 16 years old so he was really due. Chrysler was having a Fantastic 96 hour sale and this little beauty caught his eye...

Isn't it pretty??? I think I have been banned from driving it for a while. Something about Jeremy wanting to keep it dent free for at least two months. He's so selfish! But there "she" is in all her glory...although SHE doesn't have a name. Apparently, real men don't name their vehicles...or something like that...I didn't quite catch it as it was being muttered under my husband's breath. Mom, I have it on good authority that you can drive it when you guys make it for Tanner's belated birthday celebration. Well, it's time to give my little duckie his bath...and then someone volunteered to make cookies for tomorrow. So nightie night all.

I have gum in my toaster. Green bubblegum. The kind that comes in the band-aid cases. Yup. And let me tell you, it's down in there REALLY good. Now I KNOW that I didn't put the gum in the toaster, and I am fairly certain that Jeremy didn't either--but if he did, BOY is he in trouble. Of course, Tanner does not know how the gum got in the toaster...so I am at a loss. But I do know that my dinner (eggs and sausage) is not complete without toast. I am instead having bread. I tried to make toast, but alas, it did not happen. If you're thinking about running to the kitchen to see what happens when bubble gum gets toasted let me just stop you now. It smells. Bad. And it smokes. ALOT! That's really all you need to know. For those of you that were hoping to find out what I needed for my birthday and weren't planning on donating to the "Save Ramone" fund, here's your chance. But for the record, I like the bagel/toast toasters.

My Karma ran over your Dogma

For those of you who might possibly be deluded about me having any sort of good luck whatsoever, let me just enlighten you. Remember Ramone??? Once beautiful and shiny and dent free. He was glorious to behold. Remember the accident? The one that kept me from witnessing the happiest day of one of my best friend's life. I think that I handled everything pretty well considering. I'm fairly certain that Shelly and Alex voted me "Best Person to be in an Accident With". I remained calm, cool and collected throughout the whole ordeal, and even managed to laugh about the situation. Why? Because that's the kind of girl I am. I take life as it comes at me and enjoy whatever it doles out. A bit "Miss Mary Sunshine"? Perhaps--but why worry about the little stuff, right?

Well, as of Wednesday, that Juli no longer exists! Say hello to the new cynical and bitter Juli. I am cursed! What caused this huge turn around, you ask? Getting rear ended at a stop light...less than 5 days after my accident...SIGH. Oh friends, I wish you could have seen it. I got out to ASSESS the damage (for the second time in under a week) and just threw my hands up in the air...literally. The poor guy that hit me NERVOUSLY got out of his tank. I don't know why, maybe the maniacal gleam in my eyes scared him a little. By the time he made it over to me I was starting to laugh a little and he looked like he wanted to cry. He looked over at the front of his car--not even a smudge. Mine...well, here's where I admit that it wasn't THAT bad, it just took a chip out of the bumper..but that's really not the point here! So on seeing my semi-psychotic behavior, my husband (who had said NOTHING to this point) got out to see if he could be of assistance...HA! Long story short...after deciding it wasn't worth the hassle of having to exchange information and try to explain to my insurance company how it is possible to have two accidents in under a week, we shook hands with the still very nervous man and left. Jeremy was VERY quiet all the way home--I think he was afraid to say anything...perhaps he noticed that my right eye had started to twitch a little. In any case, God BLESS him for his silence.

I have been very excited to make it to work two days in a row without incident. But really, I don't know how long it can possibly last. We have a Friday the 13th next month, by then I may have worked up enough bad karma to actually get the vehicle stolen, or struck by lightening. On the LAST Friday the 13th, I spent the morning getting my flat tire repaired so I'm due for a biggie. We'll just have to wait and see! By the way, if anyone would be interested in carpooling with me, give me a call--I'll drive the first week!!! :0)

Our Birthday Boy!

Today, Tanner turns FOUR!! In the last month, I have run the gamut on emotions, feeling both sad and excited. Time has just flown by since the first time I held my little baby in my arms. Now he is this little man who is stubborn and independent --just like his Mommy. (Someone recently pointed my stubbornness out to me.) He is growing up so fast and today just made me realize how quickly that happens.

Last night we baked cupcakes for Tanner to take to Carol's house today. I just helped a little bit--he did the majority of the work...as you can see from the pictures. It was funny listening to him chattering away as we hung out together in the kitchen. And it was even more comical the way he bossed me around as if he was a master chef! "OK, I'm gonna crack the eggs, and you get out the mixer!"

Today, when we went in with the finished product, the other children swarmed like bees! Tanner told each and every one of them, more than once I might add, that HE had baked them all by himself. Carol and I just smiled and let him brag a little. After all, you only turn four once. He had a good day...I was a little sad that I had to work, but we have big plans for the evening.

Dinner is in the oven, and The Fox and the Hound is on TV. We are planning to snuggle up under his sleeping bag and watch the movie and munch on caramel corn. We are having his party this Sunday afternoon after everyone gets out of church. He has requested hamburgers and hot dogs (on the grill) and a Smiley Face cake to match his pillow. I'm still up in the air on the cake--I would like to do something just a little cuter for this particular birthday. Maybe I will make two, we're planning on having a house full--so it won't be wasted. We'll just have to see how much energy I have after the rest of the week. Right now, I am going to go cuddle up with the Apple of my Eye and watch some cartoons. Could anything be better than that??

Death of a Disco Dancer

Perhaps "Ramone" is not EXACTLY a disco dancer, but I am mourning my loss none the less. For those of you have not yet heard the story, let me entertain you.

Shelly E., Alex and I left Monett en route to Eureka Springs on Saturday for Marianne's wedding. We were all in good spirits and pretty excited to witness the nuptials of our beloved Marianne. The excitement was a bit short lived when approximately one hour into our journey a disaster struck. We entered a curve and were about half way into it when we saw a motorcycle heading straight for us IN OUR LANE. It was one of those surreal moments where I had to blink twice to determine if it was truly happening. A split second later I was slamming on my brakes, jerking hard on the wheel, and plowing over a sign on the side of the road. Maybe three seconds after that, my passengers and I sat in stunned silence as we tried to wrap our heads around what had just happened. After establishing that no one was injured we removed ourselves from the ditch and found a safe spot just a few yards up the road where we could asses the damage.

It's a little sad, isn't it??? Jeremy and I will be making our first payment on it this week. Go ahead, cry if you want to, I can wait. (Luckily, my husband is such that he realizes that this "hunk of metal" kept us safe and secure as we were plowing over a driveway and into the ditch. ) After the initial shock wore off and I realized that there was absolutely no way that this could have been avoided, I just let it go. The almost flattened motorcyclist came back with his friends to make sure everyone was ok and apologize. The young man had just purchased the bike and honestly shouldn't have been out riding on that particular highway--and hopefully staring down the front end of my Envoy will be an image that sticks with him for awhile. We waited for the ONLY highway patrolman in the county to arrive and by the time he got there the wedding ceremony was WELL under way. We did eventually get all the paperwork taken care of and since Ramone was still drivable we headed for the Wedding reception.

We got to witness the first dance, and talk to friends whom we hadn't seen in a while. It was a fantastic reception and I must say that Marianne and her husband Zach looked blissfully happy. (I have pictures to share with you...but blogger is being a turkey and isn't letting me post more than the two I currently have.) Then it was time to turn around and come home--the drive back went better than the drive down and we arrived home without incident.

The trip wasn't' exactly what we had expected, but even with the accident we had a fantastic time just getting to talk and laugh. I couldn't have asked for better road trip companions--and Alex when you read this--Thanks for being there...I probably wouldn't have been as calm, cool and collected without you. You're THE BEST!

Table Talk

Looking back, one of my favorite things about growing up was getting to sit down at the dinner table as a family. I'm sure, at the time, I didn't appreciate it as fully as I do now--but when you're all grown up with a child of your own you see the BIGGER picture. So it's very important to me that we sit down together at the table whenever we can and have some family time. Unfortunately, Jeremy doesn't get to join me and Tanner every night...but we do what we can.

Tonight we sat down to enjoy dinner and each others company. The food was good and the conversation was...ummm...stimulating???

Juli: (Well, I can't really tell you what I said for risk of self-humiliation--note that it was a slightly suggestive comment directed at my husband--also note that it was one of those hidden suggestive comments, since little pichers have big ears)

Jeremy: (says nothing...but eyes widen in disbelief)

Tanner: mmmmm...these noodles are yummy!!

Juli: (Laughing) You should see the look of incredulity on your face!

Jeremy: (Very blank expression) What???

Juli: (S-L-O-W-L-Y) You should see the look of incredulity on your face.

Jeremy: Did you not hear me say "what??" the first time? Who uses a word like that in everyday conversation??? I mean, you used it in a sentence, so I now know what it means...but honestly???

Juli: (laughing harder now) You just looked so incredulous...sorry...skeptical.

Jeremy: (also laughing) Why didn't you just say that the first time?? I'm a country boy! I can count on one hand the members of my family that would know what that word meant

Juli: Sorry honey, I forget I have to use small words with you.

Tanner: (with noodles in mouth and laughing hysterically) SHAKE YOUR BOOTY!!!!

Jeremy and Juli: (stunned silence followed by more laughter)

We love our child! He just always manages to say something crazy and wonderful at the most perfect time. And since he talks pretty much non stop, we're always guaranteed a laugh. Anyway, dinner ended without any more big words or outbursts, Tanner has been tucked into bed, and Jeremy and I have been thoroughly horrified by "Celebrity Duets". Now it is time to prop our feet up and just enjoy the evening. Good night to you all, and look for some good stories Sunday evening. Marianne is getting married THIS SATURDAY!!! Alex, Shelly and I are trekking to Eureka Springs for the event. I am so excited about it!

We're Expanding!

Jeremy and I have an announcement! The Bradshaw family is growing larger and we couldn't be more happy. Please join us in welcoming the two newest members of our happy home!



This afternoon, we went to the pet store with the sole intention of buying a third goldfish for Tanner's fish tank...since he said we needed one for each of us. But while we were there, Jeremy strayed away from the fish aisle and found these two little guys. After a little pouting and a small temper tantrum, Tanner and I consented and told Jeremy that he could get one if he wanted. He wanted the fire-bellied newt. I, OF COURSE, fell in love with the fire-bellied toad. You know of my frog affinity. But, I was perfectly content in letting Jeremy get his newt, Tanner his goldfish, and myself nothing more than a quiet evening. Jeremy somehow talked me into getting both of them.

Long story short, I LOVE THEM--maybe even more than the boys do. I keep taking them out of their tank to play with them. I am pretty sure that I am going to name my frog "Fuego" for his fire-red tummy, and Jeremy wants to name the newt "Vader". I'll have to sleep on it though. But I am so excited to have them and
wanted to share them with you all.

Dear Vehicle Manufacturer,

I know that I may be a bit presumptuous in writing this letter considering that YOU are the experts and I am just a lowly consumer...but I felt that after ten years of sharing the road with others I should give you a suggestion that might be useful in cutting down the number of accidents.

I was driving some very precious cargo to the baby sitter's this morning when I was forced to slam on my breaks so the man in the 1985 Ford truck in front of me could turn. I, of course, was very concerned for his well being when this happened. What if I had rear ended this poor unsuspecting individual??? He was very busy at the time trying to figure out why his Billy Ray Cyrus tape wasn't working and he never would have known what hit him. What if the toothpick he was chewing on had gotten lodged in his throat?? I shudder thinking about the carnage that "might have been". I keep picturing his overall buckle getting caught on the steering wheel and the half empty bottle of Jack Daniels on the floor board breaking causing the liquor to spill out and ignite with the lit cigarette that was dropped in the collision. The images that follow make me sick!!!

I know You are constantly striving to make improvements to the vehicles that fine citizens like this man and myself buy, and I believe I might have a solution. Just go with me on this one and picture, if you will, a vehicle that has some sort of apparatus that would alert the people behind you if you are going to turn...some kind of signal that would just give a little bit of warning to other drivers. Think of the good it could do!!! I don't know what exactly would work, I'll let you, the experts figure out the exact design and logistics of it all, as I'm sure it will be more complicated than what my little mind could conceive. I just thought I would throw it out there! Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,

Motorin' Mama in Missouri

My Life in Bumper Stickers

Have you ever just been driving along and seen a bumper sticker that fits you to a tee?? Have you ever realized that your life is just one bumper sticker after another??? This happened to me today.


This one describes PERFECTLY how I have been feeling this last week. After all, it's pretty discouraging to get turned down for a job that mirrors one you already have. I have tried to maintain a sense of humor about the whole thing. Even if the sense of humor was a bit self-deprecating. I did call upon my creative side and lo and behold a song was born. Tell me what you think.

To the tune of Garth Brook's song "Shameless"

I'm jobless!

Baby, I don't even care.

Every time you see me standing there

I'll be saying "spare change please?"

Ok, that's as far as I got--but I think it's a good start. I'm hoping to get it put in the little known, off broadway musical "Can't pay my RENT".

I will admit that I have been feeling a little blue. And I will even admit to eating some ice cream just cuz it made me feel better. Cookies and Cream. It was pretty tasty. This reminds me...MOM--Breyer's has cartons of light "Fried Ice Cream"!!! Yes, I said Light! Can it get any better than that?? I submit that it cannot! Disclaimer: The author of "The Bradshow" is fully aware of the consequences of emotional eating and in no way does she support it as a way of dealing with one's problems.


So, in light of everything happening here, I have found myself pondering the meaning of life. Have I just not been putting my left leg in enough?? Maybe not, but I do know I can't dwell on it. I just have to move on and keep my chin up and my head held high. By the way, I WAS offered my job back...and I accepted on a trial basis and with some conditions. Hey, it's a paycheck! We'll see how it goes. So Tuesday, I have to get up early again and back to the real world I go. It will be another adventure in the book that is my life.

Happenings...and other trifles

A Polygamist sect leader was arrested today, by the way--has anyone talked to Jeremy at all??? He seems to be missing...wonder what that's about?? Ok, maybe not, life has been kind of dull lately...so I have to spice things up a bit--It would be exciting if the article were about my husband though, right??? Come on! You have to see a little humor in that! But you all know that Jeremy would NEVER EVER IN A MILLION YEARS be a sect leader. I write things like this knowing that he RARELY reads this blog, so I can joke at his expense.

So here's a quick update of happenings in Bradshaw Land.

I had the world's shortest job interview today. I'm not kidding...four minutes. I timed it. I have no delusions that I might be getting a call back from this particular company...but it's ok cause they sought ME out. (Sorry about ending that sentence in a preposition--but you're going to have to live with it!).

Jeremy has a phone interview tomorrow with Jack Henry (yes....again!). I have to give props to him--he has made up his mind that he is going to get on with the company, and he is earnestly pursuing it. What a trooper!

Tanner and I are getting sick again. This will be our third cold/sinus infection of the summer. I think we need to up our vitamin intake. Today was day two of said infection...tomorrow will be the BAD day (I base this on past experiences), and then by Friday we should be feeling better.

I am an emotional wreck right now. Have you realized that my baby is turning four?? Jeremy and I were lying in bed last night discussing birthday plans when it hit me. I couldn't contain my tears (I'm welling up now just thinking about it!). My wonderful husband didn't say a word--he just held me, like any good husband would do--secretly I think he teared up too! Before I even have time to blink, he will be in kindergarten--how do other moms do it??? **Related note--I have been temporarily blinded from my mascara--OH THE AGONY!!!** I guess I can't stop the world from spinning though, so I will just have to come to terms with it.

See, I told you things hadn't been too exciting here lately...peaceful, really. But I share anyway, knowing that you love me and my rantings.

By the way, has anyone seen the previews for the Rock's new movie????? Phewt-phew!

I LOVE ME SOME ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It may be a BIT Premature...

...but Fall will soon be here. And I can't wait! I love everything about fall. The bright, beautiful colors, the cooler weather, even the smell of fall is magical to me. Most of all, though, there is this feeling that comes with the season that I simply can't describe. Perhaps it is because some of my favorite memories are set against the back drop of an autumn evening. When I think about each of those moments, I can still remember the way the air smelled and still feel the slight chill of the crisp night air. Some of them are so very special to me...and I think because of them, I love the fall even more.

Yesterday, it poured here. So instead of taking TW to the park we just spent some time "shopping". I found myself in the middle of the arts and crafts section looking at all the fantastic decorations they have for fall. Everything was so festive! I know it sounds a little "Martha", but I would love to be one of those women who decorates for every season and Holiday. You know the kind, they wear the pumpkin sweaters in the fall and the candy cane earrings at Christmas. I don't know that I will ever rock a pumpkin sweater...but I wouldn't mind having a seasonal front porch. Jeremy allowed me to indulge a little and I purchased some Pumpkin spice potpourri--which is, at this very instant, in my simmer pot in the kitchen. It smells like autumn here at 404 E Morningside, but it's not quite enough.

But Soon...

Soon, I will look out my window to the sight of vibrant oranges and reds. Soon, the air will grow colder and the nights shorter. Soon memories of October evenings with friends and loved ones will come rushing back to me making me wish that it could be fall all year long.

I am going out tonight. Do any of you have any idea how long it has been since I have been "out"?? I am fairly certain it is somewhere around four years. But, it is nine o' clock and I find myself preparing for something other than bed. I am too old for this...yup. But, three months ago when I was invited to go (it's Michelle's--our former neighbor--21st birthday), I didn't realize that I would wake up today feeling forty. And earlier this week when Shari called to confirm, I just didn't feel like saying no. So in approximately thirty minutes, a limo will be arriving to pick me up. I'm not kidding--it's even the Hummer version. Jeremy is staying home alone...lucky, and I get to spend a night on the town. Remember when that used to be fun--when dressing up and painting the town red was a HUGE deal? Now I just want to sit on the couch with my hubby and watch re-runs of the Golden Girls. See--told you I was getting old.

Meanwhile, despite all the drama--I am sure I will have fun. I look great (I left my modesty in my other pants). When Jeremy called me this evening I reminded him that he had married a total babe. Hey, sometimes he forgets! Who am I kidding--sometimes I forget too. I'll take pictures so that you can experience Juli's first limo ride. Good night all...Don't wait up.

Back Seat Tannerisms

Tanner and I have some of our best conversations in the car. It's true--he becomes even more talkative than usual. I am often amazed at what comes out of his mouth. Today was no exception.

On the way to Carol's this morning...

Tanner: Mommy, I want to go to THAT park. (he points)
Me: Ok, peanut...we can go on Saturday.
Tanner: Daddy too?
Me: Nope, it will just have to be you and me like last Saturday. Daddy has to work.
Tanner: But I want to go with Daddy!
Me: Well, we can wait until Sunday afternoon and then we can all go.
Tanner: (contemplates...then) No, I don't want you to go...just me and Daddy.
Me: I can't go??
Tanner: I like you, but you can't go.
Me: (Silence--because my feelings are hurt)
Tanner: You're still a good person, mommy.

So there you have it folks, my child has given me my affirmation for the day...and I am whole.

AND I know I am kind of spoiling you all right now with all this extra blogging...so here's fair warning. This PROBABLY won't continue after I am working eight hours a day again...so enjoy it while it lasts.

Dad--Don't Open Until the 24th!

"Happy Happy Birthday, from the Bradshaw crew!!" Um, I wish I knew more of the words so I could finish singing to you, but this is the point where I typically quit listening to the song being inflicted on the humiliated guest of honor and go back to eating my meal. So sorry.

But in any case, I want to wish you the happiest birthday ever! I hope your beautiful bride spoils and pampers you, and that your youth group finds some way to embarrass you. Mostly cause that's what youth groups are SUPPOSED to do. Tanner told me that he wanted to call you and sing you a special birthday song--we'll see if he still feels the same way once you pick up the phone.

By the way, I have an interview tomorrow with my bosses BIGGEST competitor. *Insert unashamed evil laughter here*. It may be wrong, but I have to say, I don't really feel all that guilty.

And now for a couple of OTHER updates.

ONE: Maison du Bradshaw is completely worm free. YIPEEEEE!!!!!!!

TWO: Sudoku is actually enjoyable. You should try it sometime.

I am so grossed out right now!

I have worms. Perhaps I should clarify and say that I have worms in my utility room. There are a bazillion of them...maybe a few less than that...on the baseboard behind the cat dish. I cannot even describe how incredibly disgusted I was when Jeremy--the man who supposedly loves me--showed them to me. And underneath the worms were tiny webs filled with a bazillion more eggs. I am not kidding...why would I??

So yesterday morning, I walked into our property managers office and looked at Keri and said very seriously, "There is a worm infestation at 404 E Morningside". Keri, who is super efficient, immediately called a terminator. God bless her. Yesterday afternoon, my cell phone rang. Let me share with you how that conversation went.

ME: HELLO?

UNKNOWN CALLER: IS THIS JULI?

ME: YES.

UNKNOWN CALLER: THIS IS LARRY WITH WRIGHT PEST CONTROL, BIRMINGHAM AND ASSOCIATES TOLD ME TO CALL YOU.

ME: OH!!! HI LARRY. IT APPEARS THAT WE HAVE A WORM INFESTATION AT OUR HOUSE.

LARRY THE WORM MAN: REALLY?? WHERE ARE THE WORMS?

ME: IN THE UTILITY ROOM, ON THE BASEBOARDS. I THINK THEY ARE COMING IN FROM THE GARAGE.

LARRY THE WORM MAN: HMMMM. WHAT COLOR ARE THE WORMS??

ME: UMMMM--SOME WERE WHITE, SOME WERE GRAYISH...I THINK.

LARRY--WORM GURU: WERE ANY OF THEM ROLLING INTO BALLS?

ME: (SILENCE) HUH??? YOU MEAN LIKE A ROLY POLY??

LARRY, WORM EXPERT: NO--NOT EXACTLY--YOU WOULD NOTICE IF ANY OF THEM HAD ROLLED INTO BALLS LIKE WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

ME: WELL, LARRY, TO BE HONEST, I WAS TOO GROSSED OUT TO NOTICE IF ANY OF THEM WERE DOING TRICKS OF ANY SORT. I JUST KNOW THAT THEY ARE WORMS AND THEY ARE IN MY HOUSE.

LARRY, WORM GOD: I THOUGHT YOU SAID THEY WERE IN THE GARAGE?

ME: (WONDERING WHY IT MATTERS) NO--THEY ARE IN MY UTILITY ROOM WHICH IS TECHNICALLY IN THE HOUSE.

LARRY, MY NEW BEST FRIEND: WHEN WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO COME TAKE CARE OF THEM??

ME: HOW 'BOUT WEDNESDAY??

So we're scheduled to be de-wormed tomorrow morning around nine. That is, unless, Larry decides that our worms are magical circus worms who should not perish. I mean, if they can roll into balls, who knows what else they might be able to do. Here's what I don't get--why do these professional men always expect you to be on their level and know what's going on?? I know NOTHING about worms **side note--my ninth grade biology teacher would be soooo disappointed about that, considering we spent a whole week dissecting one**. I will stay out of your way while you kill the worms--and then I will pay you for taking care of the problem, but please do not quiz me.

It is 10:45 p.m.--and Jeremy is DYING to teach me how to do Sudoku...can't wait. BUT, I told him I would at least give it a try. We are attempting to find something we have in common OTHER than Tanner...so far we have two things. We hate worms and we are both annoyed that I am spending so much time at home lately. Both not really things that we can bond over for long periods of time. So, maybe I will love sudoku, and we will live in wedded sudoku bliss for the rest of our lives. I'm betting though, that this time next week we will be making another attempt at finding something in common. I'll have to keep you informed on this one--it should be interesting and quite comical.

Love to you all...and think of me lying awake tonight afraid that the worms will get me. I am going to give Larry a big tip tomorrow!

Take this job and...

Well, you all know the rest of the song. It's Tuesday, but I have a definate "case of the Mondays" I DO NOT WANT TO WORK TODAY! The last couple of weeks I have just felt that going in for four hours is a complete waste of my time. I have not accomplished any of my own work--I know that for a fact. I smiled yesterday when Michele asked me if I would be willing to pick up a couple more hours a day. Of course I would, until I find a new job. I new it would happen...and in a kind of mean way, I am glad that they are FINALLY seeing how much I actually did, and realizing that THEY can't do it. Vindication in a sense. Michele even suggested that Kim might eventually make me full time again. But I am mortally wounded and couldn't work there every day without being bitter. I applied for 17 jobs yesterday. So statistics say I should get a call back on two of those. Plus I have a standing offer to install tile--hey when you work in construction those are the kind of contacts you make.

I am going to go get ready for work now--I will paste a smile on my face and walk into the office today with my head up. I will not snarl or growl at anyone, and I won't let anyone see me cry. I will simply close my door and dig into the mountain of work that is piling up on my desk. The time will fly by and soon it will be time to come home to Tanner and my sanctuary. Monday...part two, will be over and the promise of tomorrow being better will make me smile.

12 Sharp

I think I need to be a bounty hunter.
I say this, because I am fairly certain that if my favorite fictional heroine, Stephanie Plum, can do it...then so can I. I was lucky enough to purchase the newest Janet Evanovich today and am about 5 chapters away from being finished. I do wish that I had paced myself a little more, since I won't have anything to look forward to tomorrow...but I really couldn't put it down. Is there anything better than just getting to put your feet up and escape into your own fictional world every so often?? I think not!

Today my world consisted of Stolen identities, kidnappings, and the hysterical adventures of a lingerie buyer turned gun toting bond enforcement agent...I know...Glamorous! And since I am currently in the market for a new career....well, maybe not--but 12 sharp was a fun read...who's calling dibs???

In related stories, I bought TW three new books today as well: His very own Bible, which is really cute and surprisingly complete for a children's bible, a little "count the farm animals" book, and our very first CHAPTER book--which we have already read. It was an action packed one too. The age it is suggested for is actually 6 to 8--but as I predicted Tanner loved it and made me read all twelve chapters to him before he would go to bed. It's called Mercy Saves the Day, it's about a pampered pig named Mercy who saves her owners from a terrible fate. It also paints firemen and sirens in a VERY good light--I'm hoping to aleve some of Tanner's fears. I was pleased that he liked the story and he was thrilled to have so much Mommy/Tanner cuddle time before bed.

Now, I think I am going to go and finish my book, and maybe find something good on TV. Jeremy is watching Iron Chef America--which is always festive. Then it will be off to bed so that tomorrow I can get up and head back to the real world. Good night all--Thank you for sharing my weekend with me, and I'm sure the coming week will bring more to blog about.

Stopping to Smell the Flowers

There is a park here in Springfield that in MY opinion is far better than the thirty or so other parks. I found it one Saturday after we had first moved here. I was bored just sitting around the house, and I didn't know anyone yet, but I HAD to get out. So I grabbed the phone book and started looking at the local attractions section. Nathaniel Greene Park/Close Memorial Park was what caught my eye Granted it was all the way across town--but I was bored and was desperate for something. So I loaded up the car--which, at the time, meant diapers, baby wipes, bottles, teething rings, snoopy blanky, MORE diapers, lotion, etc. etc. etc. I drove, with map in hand, not really knowing what to expect and was stunned when I arrived. This park is acre upon acre of rolling green hills. There are small botanical gardens culitvated by the students at MSU, walking trails with historical markers, a small playground for the kids, a lake with hungry ducks and geese that are waiting to be fed. The most surprising thing about it though was that right in the middle of town was this calm, quiet, serene place...a virtual Garden of Eden. I immediately fell in love with the place, and try to go as often as I can. Sometimes, but not lately, I go by myself and enjoy just being alone.


Today I wanted to take Tanner somewhere where he could run freely without my having to say...Stay away from the road! So I packed up him and a picnic lunch and away we went. Today when we arrived, the rolling green hills were a little more brownish than usual, but the gardens were beautiful as always...and Tanner had free reign of the playground. So we baked in the sun, and played on the slides and the swings, and eventually Tanner had some playmates to play with. It amazes me how completely unafraid he is of...well anything really! The child has never met a stranger. He quickly made friends with Josiah, Isaiah, and Hannah and together they found a shady spot they could play in.


Before long, it was too hot to play any longer so we ate our picnic lunch under a shade tree and took a quick turn through the gardens...because you should always take time to smell the flowers and then we came home to popsicles and the sprinkler. I quickly wore my little man out...but what fun we had doing it. Right now he is curled up watching Polar Express and being oh so good...so I wanted to take a moment to share my day with you. It was lovely and fun, and all the things a Saturday with your child should be.